Thoughts to ponder this week

I got this in an e-mail from a great friend (SB) who I don't see very often, but miss dearly and think about every day, and I thought it was too good not to post. Have a great week!

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer's history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make good stories.
11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to the ten-page paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this -- ever.
15. I hate it when I miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the heck do I respond to that?
19. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
20. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with a Budweiser than Kay.

Thought for the day

Women are Angels.
And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly... on a broomstick.

We're flexible like that.

I'm moving to Mexico

After reading the headline "Another Texas-bound winter storm looming, but Houston should miss the worst" on the Houston Chronicle's Web site today, I've decided that I've had enough. I can't take anymore of this. Even though the snow is going to miss Houston, it's still going to be cold, and that's really what I'm tired of. I just want the temperatures to be normal for Houston this time of year. Is that too much to ask?

I will never complain about warm weather again...

I swear. It is Feb. 23 (dad's birthday, by the way... happy birthday dad!), and it is going to snow - yes, I said snow - in Houston today. Areas to the North could receive 2" to 4" and areas South of I-10 will receive about an inch. But forecasters warn that if the temperatures are slightly off, that could change. WTF? Did I not mention what the date is today? It's the end of February. Our normal highs are in the 60s. Today's high was 45. Notice I say was. It's now 43. And apparently going to fall enough to snow.

Look, I'm not adverse to snow. I'm from Ohio, went to school in Indiana. I've seen my fair share of snow. But that's just it... I've seen my fair share of snow. I live in Houston, Texas. Actually, South of Houston, Texas, on the coast. That would be the Gulf Coast, as in the Gulf of Mexico. It's not supposed to snow here. But today's snowfall will be the second this season. We had the earliest snowfall on record back in December, and today's snow will mark the second latest on record. They say it's supposed to warm up after this. I'm not holding my breath.

I have one word

for Rozlyn from this season of The Bachelor. B I T C H. Enough said.

Hating South Texas weather right now

This has been a really - and I mean really - odd year for weather in South Texas. We had 100 degree weather in October, it's a balmy 72 degrees now in February (just slightly above average for us this time of year), and the Houston Chronicle has a headline of "Snow a possibility as cold blast nears." W.T.F.?!?!?!?!?! I mean, seriously Mother Nature? The "experts" (whoever they are... I personally don't really believe they exist) say that this is all because of El Nino. Screw El Nino. This is crap! I came back to the South for a reason, and it wasn't the cold and snow! I will never complain about warm weather again. Never. I swear! I would much rather be sweating my brains out than shivering in the cold. I really dislike the cold weather. At least the good news out of all of this is that once this cold blast arrives, the "experts" expect it to gradually get warmer, and the temps returning to normal in March. With our usual Spring showers and thunderstorms. Bring that on any day!

Have a great week and stay warm!

Really, T-Mac? REALLY?

You're disappointed in Rockets management. You?!?! Are you freaking kidding me? According to the Houston Chronicle, "he was disappointed this season by a lack of communication from Rockets management." According to Tracy, "I didn't know. I really didn't know. And that's just the unfortunate situation, that I just like for management to be upfront and honest with me. That's all I ask, honesty. And if we can't sit and have a conversation eye to eye and be honest with me, then all the respect and trust goes out the window.”

Um, excuse me? You wanted them to be more honest? Why don't YOU try being more honest? Why did the Rockets have to learn about your surgery on your Web site? Why weren't you honest with them? I believe it was the Rockets who said you weren't ready to play a full 10 or 15 minutes after you came back, when you said you were, but no one else said that. At least they were honest, rather than telling you that you were ready. That was you talking.

Good riddance, T-Mac. I'm kinda glad you're gone. You're smart when it comes to basketball, but once you get off the court, I wonder about you. You'll fit right in in New York.

Coincidence?

So, it appears as if Tiger Woods is going to come out of hiding and address the world tomorrow. CBS reported this morning that Tiger is supposed to talk about when he is going to return to golf. Two things to note about this.

1. It just so happens that he is deciding to finally speak about whatever it is he's going to speak about while the World Golf Championships - Accenture Match Play Championship is taking place. What does this have to do with anything, you ask? Well, Accenture happens to be the first sponsor that dropped his ass after the scandal broke. In my opinion it looks as if he's trying to steal the spotlight away from the tournament to have his little chat. Well, I can't even really call it a chat because he's not taking any questions from the media. Which is another blog post entirely.
2. His agent, when asked about the timing of this announcement, said that it's all about timing, and it's better this week than next week. In the golf world, in order to play in the following week's tournament, you have to declare the Friday before. Hmmm... tomorrow is Friday... there's a tournament next week in Arizona... he's supposed to be discussing when he's coming back to the PGA...

I used to be the biggest Tiger Woods fan in the world. And I've been trying to separate his private life from his golf life. He's an amazing golfer. The world's best, literally. But I have a hard time putting aside the fact that he's an asshole.

Can't wait to hear what he has to say tomorrow. This should be good.

Looking back

For the year or so following Hurricane Ike, there were a lot of "firsts," many of which I dreaded... the first Christmas not in our house, the first anniversary of the hurricane... you get the picture. Well, almost 17 months after the hurricane struck our little slice of paradise, there are still firsts happening. Like, the first anniversary of D-Day. Man, was that an exciting day! But it was also the start of the longest five months of my life. Every day that our house was under construction, we were here. Whether we were working on it or not. Not a day went by that we weren't here. It's just strange to think about everything that we went through to get this house to where it is. Lots of blood, sweat and tears... literally. I don't ever want to go through that again.

Valentine's Day

Today is Valentine's Day (duh, I know). I'm not a big fan of this day. Really. Jay was sweet and bought me roses and a really nice card, but why should it have to be on this day, February 14 of every year, that we have to buy each other something nice and be extra sweet? Oh, that's right... because it's a totally commercial holiday. Along with Mother's Day, it's a day that florists love (and I'm sure hate at the same time), and it's a day that Hallmark does back flips because they sell hundreds of thousands of millions of cards (which, by the way, say something that you should be able to say yourself... why do you need a card to say it?), and candy makers across the world rejoice because boxes of chocolates fly off the shelves, and those gross candy hearts with silly sayings get devoured. It's a day for us to boost the economy! That's a great way to think of it! But seriously, why do we have to have a day on the calendar for all of this?

What are your Valentine's Day plans? Mine include going to breakfast with Jay (which we do every Sunday morning, by the way... we're not going just because it's Valentine's Day), watching the Daytona 500, and catching some Olympic action. Oh yea, and doing laundry. Exciting, isn't it? Just like any other day, except that it's Valentine's Day.

Olympic tragedy

I love the Olympics. Winter and Summer, doesn't matter which. I love it because it's the worlds best athletes. The best of the best. Most of them literally train their whole lives for this. It's pretty remarkable. And I get to root for Team USA. That's the best part. Team USA. I love the sound of that.

But with all of the hoopla of the Opening Ceremonies tonight, it's hard not to think about what happened today with the death of luger Nodar Kumaritashvili from the nation of Georgia. Absolutely horrible. These pictures are a little hard to look at. OK, they're a lot hard to look at. And watching the Georgian national team walk into the stadium tonight brought tears to my eyes. You could sense the pain just by looking in their faces. My heart goes out to them.

Enjoy the next few weeks of the Olympics. I'm looking forward to the downhill skiing and snowboarding. What's your favorite winter Olympic sport?

Women's Restroom

This is for all my women friends out there...

When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall.

You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern 'seat covers' (invented by someone's Mom, no doubt) is handy, but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one, but there isn't - so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck, (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR! ) yank down your pants, and assume ' The Stance.' In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake. You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold 'The Stance.'

To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, 'Honey, if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have KNOWN there was no toilet paper!' Your thighs shake more.

You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday - the one that's still in your purse. (Oh yeah, the purse around your neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time). That would have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail.

Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your purse, which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest, and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet. 'Occupied!' you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether, and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all too well that it's too late. Your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper - not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because, you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because, frankly, dear, 'You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get.'

By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire hose against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the empty toilet paper dispenser for fear of being dragged in too.

At this point, you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks. You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a drypaper towel and walk past the line of women still waiting.

You are no longer able to smile politely to them. A kind soul at the very end of the line points out a piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you NEEDED it??) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, 'Here, you just might need this.'

As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, and left the men's restroom. Annoyed, he asks, 'What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?'

This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with a public restrooms (rest??? you've GOT to be kidding!!). It finally explains to the men what really does take us so long. It also answers their other commonly asked questions about why women go to the restroom in pairs... It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse and hand you Kleenex under the door!

Pet Peeves of the week

Yes, I realize it's only Tuesday, but there are a lot of things that have gotten on my nerves this week.

1. People who dis Peyton Manning. Last week, before the Super Bowl, you all were holding him up to this impossible standard, saying he's the next best thing to sliced bread, the greatest quarterback to ever play the game, if he wins this Super Bowl it'll make him the best ever, blah, blah, blah. And then he has a bad second half (not an entire game), and no one wants anything to do with him or the Colts. They're human, people! Look, I'm as bummed as the next Colts fan that they lost, but I'm not going to sit here and dis him over and over.
2. Women who talk on their cell phone while in the bathroom. Can it really not wait 2 minutes while you pee? Do you really have to discuss with your husband / boyfriend / mom / friend what you're going to have for dinner while you're taking care of business on the pot? I don't want to hear that conversation, and I'm pretty sure the person you're talking to doesn't want to hear me flush.
3. Women who work out / play sports with a full face of make-up. When I was the volleyball SID at Rice, we played SMU every year, and their team always had a full face of make-up on like they were going to play the game and then go have Glamour Shots taken. WTF? I know when I work out, I tend to sweat. And the last thing I want is make-up running down my face. It also doesn't seem like it's very good for your skin, but I could be wrong.
4. Women who talk on their cell phone while they work out... with a full face of make-up. See #2 and #3 above.
5. The gym. OK, maybe the gym is not my pet peeve, but my lack of knowledge about what to do other than the eliptical and some free weights, is my pet peeve. I feel like a complete idiot when I go to the gym and there are all these people working out on the weight machines, so I stare at them (in the mirror) to try to figure out how it works, thinking that maybe I'll get the courage to do it. And then I feel like an idiot because I'm staring at them, and usually get caught doing so.
6. Cancer. I found out today that a good friend's mother was diagnosed with cancer, and it breaks my heart. I hate that disease. I can't do anything about it, other than give money to research to hopefully help find a cure one day.
7. Wearing new white tennis shoes, and looking down to find a blob of bright neon green gum stuck to the side. Awesome.
   

Have a great week!

The Saints go marching in

Congrats to the Saints, their fans and the city of New Orleans. To the residents of New Orleans, please, please, PLEASE do not set the city on fire tonight.

Like I said earlier, I wouldn't be upset if they won, because of everything they've been through (I've been there, too!), so it's good to see. I feel for the Colts and Peyton Manning. There was a lot of hype surrounding them the last two weeks, and a lot of pressure on them. It was really a tale of two halves. That onside kick to start the second half was brilliant, and I think it totally threw the Colts off in the second half. Love to see that a Hoosier made the pick 6 and sealed the win for the Saints. You don't hear that an Indiana Hoosier wins the Super Bowl for a team very often! Congrats Saints! Who Dat!?!?

What did you think about the ads? I wasn't totally "wowed." My favorite was the Doritos commercial with the kid who tells the guy "Don't touch my mama and don't touch my Doritos." Ha! The other good one was the plug for the Late Show with Letterman, Oprah and Leno on the couch. Of course, the Budweiser Clydesdale commercial was cute, as it usually is. So, those are my three favorite from the night.

So the burgers we made were heavenly. They melted in our mouths. The blue cheese and grilled onions on the burger were buttery and delicious. As for the homemade potato chips, well... those didn't turn out so well. They weren't horrible, but they weren't quite what I had envisioned. But the burgers made up for it. The spice cake was yummy, too. Overall, a winner. Like the Saints.

Hope you all enjoyed the game. Have a great week!

Super Bowl Sunday

Ah... Super Bowl Sunday. It's finally here. Does it get any better than this? I think not. Although it marks the end of football season (sniff, sniff, tear, tear), it's still an awesome day for so many reasons. The two best teams in the NFL will battle it out on the field. You couldn't have asked for two better teams - with probably the best quarterbacks and leaders in the game - to be the last two standing at the end of the season.

We all know I'm a Colts fan. I went to school in Indiana, and became a fan then. I lived in Indianapolis, and became an even bigger fan then. And then they drafted Peyton Manning, and that kinda sealed it for me. The Mannings are an iconic family. They're just all around good guys. Peyton has done, and continues to do, great things for the city of Indianapolis. I love that he has truly embraced that city - a city that I absolutely love - and if I didn't live here, I'd live there. That is the only other place I'd want to be. So that's why I root for the Colts.

But then there's the Saints, a team that I think a lot of America is rooting for. That city went through hell after the levy's broke following Hurricane Katrina, and when the Saints played at home in the Superdome on Monday Night Football, that sort of marked the rebirth of the city. It was a turning point for New Orleans, and the Saints led that charge. There's a lot to be said for that. New Orleans is coming back, slowly, but they're coming back, and a large part of that is thanks to the Saints. So, if for some crazy reason, the Saints win the Super Bowl today, I won't be upset. If it were any other team (OK, well any other team except the Niners or Texans), I'd probably be upset. But if New Orleans can beat Indianapolis, then that might be a really good thing. Plus, their quarterback isn't too shabby either (which kills me to say because he's a Purdue guy).

The other reason I love Super Bowl Sunday is for the ads. I'm in the marketing business, so I watch these things closely, and I really can't get enough of them. One of the most clever things I think has happened with the Super Bowl ads is that Miller High Life has bought a couple spots, and instead of running ads for their product, they're giving some small mom and pop type businesses a chance to advertise their business during the Super Bowl. Hello?!?!? C-L-E-V-E-R!!! Now that is smart marketing. I can't wait to see what the others come up with. Budweiser always has great ads. GoDaddy.com usually has some good ones. Pepsi has produced some classics lately. So, it'll be fun.

I also love Super Bowl Sunday because we usually have a good feast at our place. And this year is no exception. We're not doing a big party. Actually, it's just going to be Jay and I (which I don't mind one bit whatsoever). But, we're going to make burgers with blue cheese and grilled onions; homemade potato chips with this amazing blue cheese dip (thanks for the recipe, SB!!); deviled eggs; chinese salad; and spice cake. Yum, yum, yum!!!

I hope you're all enjoying your Super Bowl Sunday, and may the best team (Colts) win!

Can I buy you a beer?

OK, so I know I said that this week's posts were going to be football related, but I'm deviating from that today. For good reason. The only thing football related to this post is the use of the word beer. Confused? Well let me try to straighten you out.

Eight years ago today (the date, not the actual day... it was actually a Wednesday, but who remembers this stuff anyway?) I met Jay. My cousin called me late while I was still in the office, and wanted to know if I could meet her for a beer. Of course I could. Back then I was in my early 20's and didn't say no to a beer. So we went out to this little hole in the wall ice house called The Rose Garden. I have no idea how she ever found this place, but now that I look back on it, I'm kinda glad she did. She and I were talking, minding our own business, when the table next to us starts talking about a one-armed stripper and getting in to a big black truck with "Bubba" written across the back. You all know me... my nosy self couldn't keep my mouth shut, so I had to say a smart-ass remark, something along the lines of "the fact that he had 'Bubba' written across the back of his truck should have been your first clue not to get in." The next thing I know we had two fresh, cold Coors Lights on our table, courtesy of a guy in Wranglers, boots and a polo shirt. Little did I know that eight years later I'd be madly in love with the guy who got in the "Bubba" truck.

Jay didn't get my phone number that night (typical guy), but one of the ladies who worked with him did (smart woman that Miss Judy!). She called me about a week later and said they were all heading back up to The Rose Garden and that I should come. I happened to be sitting in the Columbus, Ohio, airport, on my way back from a job interview at Ohio State. I said I might, knowing full well that The Rose Garden was on my way back from the airport and that I had every intention to stop in, and that there was a chance Jay would be there, so I stopped. And let me tell you... I was wearing a suit (again, just finished up with a job interview), and I turned some heads when I walked in that place. I still remember the looks on some people's faces. It was quite priceless, because I was a little over dressed. But, they welcomed me in to their table, bought me a beer, and the rest is kinda history.

Jay got my digits that night (even walked me out to my car), and here we are today, eight years later. I'd list all the shit (good and bad) that we've been through, but that would make for the longest blog post ever, and I don't want to bore you all. I adore Jay, and love him with all my heart. He makes me laugh, he comforts me when I'm sad, he knows how to push my buttons, and he would do anything to make me happy. I love you honey!!!!!!!

Crazy Super Bowl bets

Betting is one thing I've never gotten in to. Mainly because I don't have a ton of money lying around to just waste away. And, if I did, I don't think I'd have the balls to put a large wad of cash down on something that I have absolutely no control over whatsoever. But I do love to read about people who bet and what they bet on. Like some of these crazy Super Bowl bets. I mean, really? You can bet on what color Gatorade gets dumped on the winning coach, or how many times Archie and Eli Manning will appear on TV, or even how long it will take Carrie Underwood to sing the national anthem. If I were a betting man (or woman), I'd say yellow, eight and 1:52. But I'm not. I'm just sayin'. What about Kim Kardashian? How many times is she going to get on TV? This is crazy. But it's the Super Bowl. And I absolutely love the Super Bowl. And I can't wait for it to get here, crazy, stupid bets or not.

The Catch

I would not be doing anyone justice (OK, maybe just me, really, but whatever) if I didn't mention "The Catch" this week. I mean, it involved only the best football player ever to play the game and walk the face of this planet (and no, I'm not referring to Dwight Clark). If you don't know what I'm talking about, then I really can't speak to you anymore. Really.

"The Catch" is one of the most notable plays ever in NFL history. The greatest player on earth in any sport (can you tell I'm a fan?) - Joe Montana - threw the winning touchdown pass to Dwight Clark in the 1982 NFC Championship game against the Dallas Cowboys. Down 27-21 with under a minute to go, the great Montana did what he always did so well... drove the 49ers down to near the goal line and made the play that sent the Niners to the Super Bowl. Clark made an amazing catch, and the Niners were headed to the biggest game of the year. Does it get any better than that? OK, maybe a win in the Super Bowl tops it, but that play will forever live in infamy. Unfortunately for me, I was only 4 years old when it happened, so I really have no recolection whatsoever of seeing this play when it happened (if I saw the play when it happened) but it's still one of my favorite plays, by my all-time favorite player on one of my most favoritest teams. Yes, I know favoritest isn't a word, but I want you to know how much I love Joe Montana and the San Francisco 49ers.

I'm ready for the Super Bowl. I wish it would get here already! In the meantime, I'm going to watch this video over and over and over and over and re-live the moment. And you can, too! Ahhh, football...

Most popular food on Super Bowl Sunday

What do you think the most popular food on Super Bowl Sunday is? Wings? Burgers? Pizza? Queso? Nope, it's none of those. Although queso is a personal favorite of mine. I could drink it. Really. I would drink that instead of a beer. Any day. But that's not the point. I digress. The point is, according to the NPD Group market research firm that tracks American's eating habits, the most popular food on Super Bowl Sunday is veggies. Yep, that's right. I said veggies. Veggies. Veggies. Veggies. Don't believe me? See for yourself what the group had to say.

I haven't decided exactly what we'll be having at our house for the big day. Queso is a given, but besides that, I'm not quite sure. Burgers sound good. Ooo... with homemade chips. And some form of a blue cheese dipping sauce. Of course beer bread sounds really good, too. And artichoke dip. Maybe some hummus and pita chips. Gotta have brownies, too, and a chocolate chip cookie cake sounds yummy. And... OK, I need to stop. I'm making myself hungry, and I just ate dinner!

So, what's your favorite Super Bowl Sunday food? Whatever it is, have fun and enjoy the big game! I know I will!!

18 things you need to know about my future husband

In honor of the SuperBowl coming up this weekend, this week's posts will be SuperBowl and / or football related. So, to start things off, I thought you might want to know 18 things about my future husband - Peyton Manning. The guy is sick. His work ethic, his talent, his life... it's sickening. But I love him anyway.